Why I would Do Anything For him
I love how at the end of a long day at school, and many, many horrible things happening to me, that I can crawl in to bed at night and he’s right there. He can’t sleep up with me anymore, I’m tired of the dirt and the hair, but he’s right there on the left side of my bed. And when it’s still and quiet in the witching hour, I can listen and hear the deep rhythm of his breathing. Faye snores in her corner, but Beau is always truly, deeply at rest. Like he had a hard day too. Like he understands exactly what I went through and knows that misery loves company. He’s the steady in my life, the constant shadow I watch out for when I step out of bed, the little nudge with a cold nose in the morning, the bright brown eyes that make my heart melt everytime I look in to them.
So much changes around me, everything is always getting worse or getting betters, and Beau, he’s always the same. A little more excited or a little more sleepy, but his needs and wants are constant and enough for me to handle.
I read in a book that the reason people have dogs is because its like the perfect marriage. You can give as much, or as little, as you like, and it’s always returned in excess. Dogs don’t nag and they don’t care what you look like or that you haven’t showered since yesterday. They are happy to do what you want to do, just as they are happy to share their interests with you (we’re always very excited about poop and squirrels at my house). They are content with silence, they are content with laughter and noise. My dogs sleep through everything. They don’t argue you with you about how you spend your money, how you dress, why you are miserable at your job all the time. They don’t trade you in for the newer model when you get old and they look just as bad but they want to think they are puppies again. The point is - they don’t care. They just want you - every little piece and smell and quirk of you - and they always give back. They are selfless and they are forgiving. It’s why we can love them so much and rarely find ourselves divorcing them.
I would give anything for Beau. He’s everything I have. I don’t care if we have to live in a box the rest of our lives, as long as I have him, everything is right in this world, no matter how much it spins so violently out of control. He’s only himself and I only have to be myself around him. All my hats and costumes get left at the door and nothing else matters.
He needs a TECA - total ear canal ablation. It will cost a fortune. At first, I was worried about the cost, the impact, the possible student loans that may result. But now, none of that matters. He’s the single most important thing to me in the whole world simply for the fact that unlike everyone else, he’s never once lost faith in me or found me unworthy. So he’ll get his TECA, he’ll live without any more infection in that ear, and I can at least pretend that I have slightly returned the favor for his constant unwavering friendship. Even if it means I will have to eat less and keep the A/C off for a month and delay getting any internet other than the dialup I have now… I just can’t bear the thought of him not having everything he needs.
Thanks, Beau, for being the best dog ever. Even if no one else understands you or wants you, you are everything to me, as always, and forever.
can't imagine life without them, obsession with dog |Leave a Reply