Not entirely incompetent
Today I successfully drew blood from an animal (of any species) for the 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th and 8th times. The first two times were on dogs (one in class and once on poor Beaubers) and the other 6 times were on an Angus-cross beef cow - 3 times from the jugular (two left handed, one right handed) and 3 times from that vein that’s in the tail. By the way, in order to get the blood from the tail (it’s actually an artery and vein that run together) you have to jab the needle into something technically termed the “soft spot” and you plunge that needle into the animal until you hit the bone. That is, its vertebra. It was sort of a sickening feeling, rather like fingernails scraping down a chalkboard. Getting the jugular vein was a little less creepy, but in my case it involved practically karate-chopping the neck of the cow and then jabbing it in the neck with a 1.5″ 18 gauge needle before jumping back away as it thrashed wildly (or mooed sadly) as if someone had just set my butt on fire. I’m going to write a book and call it “Karate Venipuncture - The Ultimate Jugular Blood Draw Method” (now only four payments of $19.99 with guaranteed results). I can add it to my repertoire of things I know that fall in the category of “holistic medicine” because it involves something dubiously named and perhaps slightly questionable in the execution. However, by the third draw, I got blood in the needle right away and my whole group applauded (I need the moral support because although I may not be incompetent, I am in fact, an imbecile).
In other news, I have made a new list of “Fantasy Purchases.” This is not a list like the “List” (of which no information shall ever be divulged, sorry commenter whose post I did not approve, because that would really just take all the fun out of it), but rather a list of the three things I really wish I had an endless supply of money to purchase.
1. A new flat panel LCD TV, preferably at least 32″
2. A new digital piano, preferably, the Yamaha Nocturne
3. A motorcycle, under 600cc, and probably used. Also the classes I need to take to actually learn how to operate and drive a motorcycle, all the gear I need to protect my small and fragile body from the inevitable death crash I will be involved in, and the money to pay for insurance and secret underground basement that I will have to construct in order to hide it from my parents.
So far it looks like #1 is winning. Here’s is why.
1. Costs about $1000.
2. Costs about $3000.
3. Costs like… $8000, if I can find a little Ninja or something for about $2000.
Oh, and no one will ever hire me for the summer because, 1) I am an incompetent imbecile, and 2) I will not be returning from Germany until June 8. And at that point I will be severely jet-lagged and my ears will still probably be in severe pain, as always happens when I fly.
ARG, where did all my studying motivation for physiology go? crapcrapcrapcrap
old stuff | Comment (0)Pros and Cons
Pros about this semester:
1. Last semester until First Year is over
2. Last time I will have to dedicate hours to the study of anatomy
3. Watching the house be built
4. It’s still cool outside and it’s the end of February
5. I’ve gotten to know some really fun people better
Cons about this semester:
1. I have to dedicate hours to studying anatomy and physiology
2. My study abroad trip to Germany is riding on my grades from this semester
3. Watching the house be built instead of being able to live in it
4. It’s been really rainy and both Beau and I are tired of the mud hole that is the backyard
5. People on my “List” are more firmly cementing themselves there everyday
It’s a beautiful, gorgeous day outside, and I will probably spend the majority of it here, inside, studying. Boo.
old stuff | Comment (0)if only he could talk
I was walking in the park in the rain with Beau this afternoon. We made it almost around the first part of our route, around the small lake, when it started to sprinkle. It was just us and the ducks out there, and the sprinkles turned into drops, which turned into really big drops, and then all of a sudden it was hailing on us. Poor Beau was fine with the sprinkles, kinda not-okay with the drops, really not okay with the big drops; when it started to hail, he just got this great look on his face. His eyes were all squinted and his head and hunkered down and he was walking as slow as he possibly could. I’m pretty sure if he could have spoken it would have been a long string of expletives about how I am a horrible mother.
Like, seriously, wtf? Hail? You have got to be kidding me. I’d soooo rather be back in that 6×4 prison cell they called a “community” and not taken home right now for a warm bath and some dinner. Because you are horrible.
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